| 1 |
| I am stepping on the flowers. |
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| 2 |
| Sometimes, late at night, I cry. |
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| 8 |
| Do you have change for a fifty? |
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| 9 |
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| 10 |
| All I need is some speed. |
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| 11 |
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| 12 |
| My friends are plotting against me. |
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| 13 |
| Those who I know, I do not. |
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| 14 |
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| 20 |
| Halloween is my favorite holliday. |
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| 21 |
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| 24 |
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| 25 |
| Last night my wife left me. |
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| 26 |
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| 27 |
| I lost my savings in the stock market. |
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| 28 |
| My vaccuum cleaner is broken. |
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| 29 |
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| 30 |
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| 31 |
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| 32 |
| 98...99...um, um, nevermind. |
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| 33 |
| What happed to good music? |
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| 34 |
| Smooth Jazz makes me itch. |
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| 35 |
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| 36 |
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| 37 |
| All I want is clean socks. |
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| 38 |
| I overslept and missed my bus. |
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| 39 |
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| 40 |
| The people, they mock me. |
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| 41 |
| My aunt called me stupid. |
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| 42 |
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| 43 |
| The trash, it confuses me. |
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| 44 |
| Why does it hurt so much. |
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| 45 |
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| 46 |
| The police tried to kill me. |
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| 47 |
| I think I swallowed a bug. |
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| 48 |
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| 49 |
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| 50 |
| My mustache is taking over my brain. |
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| 51 |
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| 52 |
| A veces, tarde de noche, yo lloro. |
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| 53 |
| Por quŽ usted no abraza apenas alguien ya? |
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| 54 |
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| 55 |
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| 56 |
| La marca de la flor que m’ vomito. |
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| 57 |
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| 58 |
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| 59 |
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| 60 |
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| 61 |
| Tiene usted el cambio para un cincuenta? |
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| 62 |
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| 63 |
| Mis ni–os no me respetan. |
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| 64 |
| Todo necesito es alguna velocidad. |
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| 65 |
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| 66 |
| Mis amigos traman contra m’. |
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| 67 |
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| 68 |
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| 69 |
| Ayśdeme encuentro a mi mami. |
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| 70 |
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| 71 |
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| 72 |
| Haga mi gordura de la mirada de muslos. |
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| 73 |
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| 74 |
| Usted no ser’a amado m‡s bien? |
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| 75 |
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| 76 |
| La v’spera de todos los santos es mi holliday favorito. |
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| 77 |
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| 78 |
| Conan no ha sido el mismo desde que Andy parti—. |
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| 79 |
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| 80 |
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| 81 |
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| 82 |
| Anoche mi esposa me dej—. |
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| 83 |
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| 84 |
| Perd’ mis ahorros en las acciones venden. |
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| 85 |
| Matar’a para algśn oranges. |
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| 86 |
| Mi limpiador de vaccuum se rompe. |
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| 87 |
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| 88 |
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| 89 |
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| 90 |
| QuŽ pas— a la mśsica buena? |
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| 91 |
| El Jazz liso me hace pico. |
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| 92 |
| Tengo un sarpullido horrible. |
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| 93 |
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| 94 |
| Todo quiero es calcetines limpios. |
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| 95 |
| Dorm’ m‡s de lo previsto y perd’ mi autobśs. |
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| 96 |
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| 97 |
| La gente, ellos me ridiculizan. |
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| 98 |
| Tengo nunca obtuvo una vez una tarjeta de cumplea–os. |
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| 99 |
| Mi t’a me llam— estśpido. Como bichos. |
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| 100 |
| Yo no puedo esperar para morir. |
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| 101 |
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| 102 |
| Por quŽ lo hace lastim— tanto. |
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| 103 |
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| 104 |
| La polic’a trat— de matarme. |
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| 105 |
| Pienso que traguŽ un bicho. |
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| 106 |
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| 107 |
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| 108 |
| Los bigotes asume poder el cerebro. |
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| 109 |
| I have never obtained once a card of birthday. |
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| 110 |
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| 117 |
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| 118 |
| Is it a crime to love too much? |
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| 119 |
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| 120 |
| My orafaces emit a foul stench. |
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| 121 |
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| 122 |
| Do you believe in fairies? |
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| 123 |
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| 124 |
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| 125 |
| I dropped out of pre-school. |
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| 126 |
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| 127 |
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| 128 |
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| 129 |
| I only wish that the world could love a bandito like me. |
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| 130 |
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| 131 |
| If only angels were REAL. |
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| 132 |
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| 133 |
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| 134 |
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| 135 |
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| 136 |
| Why, sunsets are just about my favorite thing in the whole world. |
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| 137 |
| Give me liberty or give me pancakes, well just pancakes will do fine. |
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| 138 |
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| 139 |
| This sure is a lonesome existance. |
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| 140 |
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| 141 |
| Aldus used to make Freehand. |
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| 142 |
| I just wanna get to Pencil-Bania. |
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| 143 |
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| 144 |
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| 145 |
| My father was a stewardess. |
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| 146 |
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| 147 |
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| 148 |
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| 149 |
| My moustache is full of crusted vomit. |
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| 150 |
| I wish I could breath fire and smite all my enemies, then they would all see. he he. |
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| 151 |
| This is one-hundered and sixty. |
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| 152 |
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| 153 |
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| 154 |
| Mr. Bandito, as President what do you plan to do about Health Care Reform? |
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| 155 |
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| 156 |
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| 157 |
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| 158 |
| Are bullets tax deductable? |
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| 159 |
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| 160 |
| All I do is watch CNN in my underware. |
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| 161 |
| My hat is a weapon of mass destruction. |
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| 162 |
| The best woman used to be a man. |
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| 163 |
| My dog understands me with telepathy. |
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| 164 |
| I can only hope to find some dog poo. |
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| 165 |
| I think I left the oven on. |
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| 166 |
| ...As with coffee, I get the jitters... |
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| 167 |
| Can you believe it? Four whole bags! Hot Damn. |
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| 168 |
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| 169 |
| My doctor said that my problem lies in my stupidity. |
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| 170 |
| Click me for the Ass-man. |
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| 171 |
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| 172 |
| i AM the BROADBANDITO! Give me your bandwith! |
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| 173 |
| Hand over all of your bndwith! |
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| 174 |
| I want an internet radio staion. |
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| 175 |
| I once shot a man just to watch him ... oooooo, look, a butterfly! |
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| 176 |
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| 177 |
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| 178 |
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| 179 |
| Here comes the gravy pipe... |
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| 180 |
| My guns are my only friends. |
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| 181 |
| My guns are my only friend. |
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| 182 |
| Beetleguise, Beetleguise, uh, I forgot. |
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| 183 |
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| 184 |
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| 185 |
| When I was your age we had rocks for breakfast. |
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| 186 |
| That used to mean something to me. |
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| 187 |
| I used to be a web designer. |
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| 188 |
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| 189 |
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| 4218 |
| KgJXMDRISsctrtRRt |
| http://sulug.sun.ac.za/cgi-bin/moin.cgi/huge-tits-272 |
| piKeAYwPcgQ |
| http://sulug.sun.ac.za/cgi-bin/moin.cgi/huge-tits-272 |
| nvsIrQhecVSfEurM |
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| 190 |
| I fear the Burger King, and nothin else. |
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| 191 |
| Shout out to Ripped Magazine! |
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| 192 |
| You know that moment, right after you cut yourself? I love that. |
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| 193 |
| When I was yur age, we were AFRAID of Jesus, and his zombie army. |
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| 198 |
| My under-roos feel butterey. |
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| 199 |
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| 200 |
| Used to be a man could get some service around here, used to be. |
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| 201 |
| What ever happened to GWAR? |
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| 202 |
| I almost married Toni Braxton, then the police found us. |
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| 203 |
| Has you seen a contact lens, about yeah big? |
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| 204 |
| Once upon a time, (sob)... |
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| 205 |
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| 206 |
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| 207 |
| Internet Explorer has a cheap-ass dressing room. |
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| 208 |
| I asked for BROWN M&Ms!!!! |
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| 209 |
| Can you believe they let me NEAR children? |
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| 210 |
| Shit, that was the last Bambu. |
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| 211 |
| That almost makes me wanna smoke my last cigarette...almost. |
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| 212 |
| This hat is the only thing between the sky and my brain. |
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| 213 |
| I was born with a wire hanger stuck in my head. |
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| 214 |
| I have a LOT of time on my hands. |
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| 215 |
| There IS a source to that smell. |
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| 216 |
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| 218 |
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| 219 |
| The day of BANDITO is come!!! |
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| 220 |
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| 221 |
| Abe Bagota is my personal hero. |
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| 222 |
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| 223 |
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| 224 |
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| 225 |
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| 226 |
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| 227 |
| How cold is it now in Florida? |
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| 228 |
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| 229 |
| Winter is my favorite season. |
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| 230 |
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| 231 |
| Cold butter is hard to spread. |
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| 232 |
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| 233 |
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| 234 |
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| 236 |
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| 237 |
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| 238 |
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| 239 |
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| 240 |
| Everyone keeps sending me stuff |
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| 241 |
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| 242 |
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| 243 |
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| 244 |
| What is meant by CURVED space time? |
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| 245 |
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| 246 |
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| 247 |
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| 248 |
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| 249 |
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| 250 |
| I think it must be, after hanging out with you for so long |
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| 251 |
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| 256 |
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| 257 |
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| 258 |
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| 260 |
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| 261 |
| fucking is my favoerite activity too |
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| 262 |
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| 263 |
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| 264 |
| say something coheriantly |
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| 265 |
| haha, cowboys with cramps |
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| 266 |
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| 267 |
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| 268 |
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| 269 |
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| 270 |
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| 271 |
| who ever thought that I would have anything in common with a mexican bandito? |
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| 272 |
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| 273 |
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| 274 |
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| 275 |
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| 276 |
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| 277 |
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| 278 |
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| 279 |
| My moustache is tax deductable. |
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| 280 |
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| 281 |
| Look what I looted from the museum in Iraq |
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| 282 |
| Clicking me will bring you to the man of ass. |
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| 283 |
| You look damn fine, like my momma (sniff). |
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| 284 |
| I - wanna rock and roll all night - and party every -BUTTERFLY!!! |
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| 285 |
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| 286 |
| What is the truth today, may not me the truth tomorrow. |
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| 287 |
| Did you see that game last night? |
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| 288 |
| These guns are actually chocolate/ |
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| 289 |
| These guns are made of chocolate. |
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| 290 |
| Those scientists promised me candy. |
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| 291 |
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| 292 |
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| 293 |
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| 294 |
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| 295 |
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| 296 |
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| 297 |
| Damned Fleecie Beast drank muh gin! |
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| 298 |
| Rick Shapiro ate my crack |
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| 299 |
| Nothing happened. Naturally I was scared. |
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| 300 |
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| 301 |
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| 302 |
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| 303 |
| Whats the exchange rate on Wu-longs? |
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| 304 |
| I wish these guns were real... |
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| 305 |
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| 306 |
| Finally some scenery in this joint. |
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| 307 |
| Shit tastes good, I promise. |
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| 308 |
| Why if I had a dollar, Oh yeah. |
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| 309 |
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| 310 |
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| 311 |
| I am the eternal Puddingpop!!! |
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| 312 |
| Imagine that, a mouse with a fairy godmother. |
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| 313 |
| I SAID I WISH I HAD A FAIRY GODMOTHER... |
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| 314 |
| I like Tom and Jerry ... some of them. |
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| 315 |
| I wish I left smoke trails wherever I went. |
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| 316 |
| Ha Ha, animals with fur bikinis. |
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| 317 |
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| 318 |
| My friends had an intervention to make me stop being a Bandito. |
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| 319 |
| I wish everything was free. |
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| 320 |
| When I die my spirit will go to Bandito Heaven. |
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| 321 |
| I love the Power Puff Girls. Bubbles is my favorite. |
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| 322 |
| Please add to my troubles down there... |
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| 323 |
| Apple makes some damn fine crap. Tell the world! |
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| 324 |
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| 325 |
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| 326 |
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| 327 |
| I wish I was inside a video game about me. |
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| 328 |
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| 329 |
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| 330 |
| Produced by Fred Quimby (not really) |
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| 331 |
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| 332 |
| Where do bad folks go when they die? |
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| 333 |
| Charles Barkley is gay ... trust me. |
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| 334 |
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| 335 |
| Whats that boy, your talkin giberish... |
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| 336 |
| I had a horrible dream that I was a Bandito and ... oh. |
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| 337 |
| Imagine if this was all a webpage ... shit. |
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| 338 |
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| 339 |
| Do you remember the sound of clasic soul. |
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| 340 |
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| 341 |
| You got me going in circles. |
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| 342 |
| James Taylor does things to me. |
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| 343 |
| That show with the Cowboy and the Bebop, yeah that one... |
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| 344 |
| Spic and ... somethingorother... |
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| 345 |
| ...I was young, and needed the money... |
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| 346 |
| Hold it, hold it. You wanna get robbed? |
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| 347 |
| This is Man-Talk, Man-Business! |
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| 348 |
| I hate to be a back-seat plumber... |
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| 349 |
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| 350 |
| You selfish little moocher... |
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| 351 |
| All I gots to drink is vegetable oil. |
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| 352 |
| Take me to this "Mayor McCheese"! |
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| 353 |
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| 354 |
| Four-Fourty-Four, Mmmmmmayhap... |
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| 355 |
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| 356 |
| Wolf Blitzer, yeah right. |
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| 357 |
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| 358 |
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| 359 |
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| 360 |
| Where can I get one of those RPG anti-tank guns? |
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| 361 |
| Where can I get my spider veins treated? |
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| 362 |
| I lost my Magnum XL Trogan. |
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| 363 |
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| 364 |
| 457: Server Error - One too many bagels. |
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| 365 |
| 458 Server Error: Server experiencing mental issues. |
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| 366 |
| 460 Server Error: server is lonely. |
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| 367 |
| 461 Server Error: Webmaster unplugging anal beads. |
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| 368 |
| 462 Server Error: Evil overlord captured the server. Self destruct activated. |
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| 369 |
| 463 Server Error: Server needs cigarettes. |
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| 370 |
| 465 Server Error: Server arrested in bombing investigation. |
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| 371 |
| 466 Server Error: The President is a shithead. |
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| 372 |
| 467 Server Error: CEO apology not convincing. |
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| 373 |
| 468 Server Error: A dingledong in the ass cheese. |
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| 374 |
| 469 Server Error: Server on Strike (SCAB!). |
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| 375 |
| 470 Server Error: Server no longer trusts the public. |
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| 376 |
| 471 Server Error: Server needs clean diaper. |
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| 377 |
| 473 Server Error: Server not able to cope with Post September 11th world. |
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| 378 |
| 474 Server Error: Server low on cheese. |
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| 379 |
| 475 Server Error: Server feels fat. |
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|
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|
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| 380 |
| 476 Server Error: Server was fired for being homosexual. |
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|
|
| 381 |
| 477 Server Error: Military Chopper housing server crashed. |
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|
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| 382 |
| 479 Server Error: "Garbage In" taken too literally. |
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|
|
| 383 |
| 480 Server Error: Disembodied Monkey Brain Dieing... |
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|
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| 384 |
| 481 Server Error: Server Kernel Corrupted, and taking prisoners... |
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|
|
| 385 |
|
| 386 |
| 481 Server Error: Server Kernel Corrupted, and taking prisoners... |
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|
|
| 387 |
|
| 388 |
| Commodore 64, a rainbow in a box. |
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|
|
|
|
| 389 |
|
| 390 |
| 490 User Error: User a stinking Jets Fan. |
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|
|
| 391 |
| 491 User Error: Garbage in the gravy pipe. |
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|
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|
|
| 392 |
| 492 User error: User computer too damn old. |
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|
|
|
|
| 393 |
| 493 User Error: User wants to sex me up. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 394 |
| 494 User error: User has been naughty. |
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|
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|
|
| 395 |
|
| 396 |
| That sure was a great cruise. All those nice mens. |
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|
|
| 397 |
| ODB out of the tank, but for how long? |
|
|
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|
|
| 398 |
| phase one in which Doris gets her oats. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 399 |
|
| 400 |
|
| 401 |
| You and me chasing paper, getting nowhere, on our way back home... |
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|
|
| 402 |
| Gimmie some of that old time Jazz! |
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|
|
| 403 |
| Who now with the what what? |
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|
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|
|
| 404 |
| I wanna be dictator of america. |
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|
|
| 405 |
|
| 406 |
| I will be King of America! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 407 |
| Bow before the King of America! |
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|
|
|
|
| 408 |
| King Bandito of the Jellyfish. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 409 |
|
| 410 |
|
| 411 |
| I voted for the Death Party. |
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| 412 |
|
| 413 |
|
| 414 |
| Can I count on your vote, ha ha, count your v... sorry. |
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|
|
| 415 |
| Take that Mayor McCheese! |
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|
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| 416 |
| How about Mayor Bandito? Nah. |
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|
|
| 417 |
| Vote Bandito President of the NRA. |
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|
|
| 418 |
| Bandito wants your vote, and he aint afraid to shoot. |
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|
|
| 419 |
| Vote for the moustache and hat! |
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|
|
| 420 |
| Wise man say, Itchy butt lead to smelly finger. |
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|
|
| 421 |
|
| 422 |
|
| 423 |
|
| 424 |
|
| 425 |
| I used to like it hot, but this is rediculous! |
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|
|
| 426 |
| I Bandito will go ... Into the Microworld! |
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|
|
| 427 |
|
| 428 |
| The Desert, unchanged for millions of years, yet borne witness to the ancient prophecy that one day, the meek shall inherit the earth... |
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|
|
| 429 |
| Creatures watch my every move, just waiting. |
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|
|
| 430 |
| I love hidden nooks in a cozy kitchen. |
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|
|
| 431 |
| Six weeks after hatching a Bandito is ready for sex. |
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|
|
| 432 |
| I just shed my exoskeleten. |
|
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|
|
| 433 |
| Ladies are you tired of embarrasing hair stubble? |
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|
|
| 434 |
| A bandito and his desert. |
|
|
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|
| 435 |
|
| 436 |
|
| 437 |
|
| 438 |
|
| 439 |
|
| 440 |
| Just remember this, one fly can carry 3million germs. |
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|
|
| 441 |
| Ah Death Valley, the home of a bandito. |
|
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|
| 442 |
| I eat tiny flakes of skin. |
|
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|
|
| 443 |
| There are millions of banditos in this desert. |
|
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|
|
| 444 |
| Moths hate the smell of Banditos. |
|
|
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|
|
| 445 |
| Na na na na na na na na na na na Bandito! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 446 |
|
| 447 |
|
| 448 |
| That OS X boy, thats something else. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 449 |
|
| 450 |
| ...and the cops are still looking for me. |
|
|
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|
|
| 451 |
| There is no time, only infinite space. |
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|
| 452 |
| Look at the butt on that. |
|
|
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|
| 453 |
|
| 454 |
|
| 455 |
|
| 456 |
| I gots me one of them new fangled DVD players, no TV though. |
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|
|
| 457 |
| Ring my Beeeeeellllll, ring my bell. |
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|
|
| 458 |
| The Desert, unchanged for millions of years, yet borne witness to the ancient prophecy that one day, the meek shall inherit the Earth... |
|
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|
|
| 459 |
| I must execute "The Plan" |
|
|
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|
|
| 460 |
| I was once a man, a man goddamnit, a man! |
|
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|
|
| 461 |
| Bullshit! Always with the bullshit. |
|
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|
|
| 462 |
|
| 463 |
|
| 464 |
|
| 465 |
|
| 466 |
|
| 467 |
|
| 468 |
| Donde es Culebra in the cat box |
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|
| 469 |
| Take me to Donald Rumsfeild... |
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|
|
| 470 |
| I believe some of us were promised pie. |
|
|
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|
|
| 471 |
|
| 472 |
| My kingdom for some smoking frogs. |
|
|
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|
|
| 473 |
|
| 474 |
| I was once the director of the CIA. |
|
|
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|
|
| 475 |
| I shot JR, you know, John Rennon. |
|
|
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|
|
| 476 |
|
| 477 |
| I gots to get my act together if I ever want financial independence. |
|
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|
|
| 478 |
|
| 479 |
| They think they know who I am, all they know is I love to kill! Face down, dead on the ground! Find me before another is found! |
|
|
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|
|
| 480 |
| What happened to New York City? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 481 |
|
| 482 |
| How many pizzas am I holding? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 483 |
| In your own words, eplain the theory of relativity. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 484 |
|
| 485 |
|
| 486 |
|
| 487 |
| Sunny side up egg covered Bosco brand chocolate sauce |
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|
|
|
|
| 488 |
|
| 489 |
|
| 490 |
|
| 491 |
| The cat shat my chickens! |
|
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|
|
| 492 |
|
| 493 |
| I voted for, no I mean Against... |
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|
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|
|
| 494 |
|
| 495 |
|
| 496 |
| One bourbon, one scotch, one beer. |
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|
|
| 497 |
|
| 498 |
|
| 499 |
| Did you mention the spelling? |
|
|
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|
|
| 500 |
|
| 501 |
| She loves me in another state |
|
|
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|
|
| 502 |
|
| 503 |
| Wrap yourself around that rack of DVDs |
|
|
|
|
|
| 504 |
|
| 505 |
|
| 506 |
| Nick at Night is full of LIES! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 507 |
|
| 508 |
| I got bit by the old flu bug, then I bit him. It was messy, but were both better for it. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 509 |
| Fat people need lovin, most of all. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 510 |
|
| 511 |
| Whyy does it always hurt so much? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 512 |
| Am I gay? . . . Nahhh, come on kitty, lets blow this joint. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 513 |
| You know that show Trading Spaces, yeah neither do I. |
|
|
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|
|
| 514 |
| You know that show Trading Spaces, yeah neither do I. |
|
|
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|
|
| 515 |
| How many more things have I got to do? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 516 |
| If I introduce you as Dave, and you as Tom, just play along. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 517 |
| Ooooo, the Cosby Show! watch me sit back down. |
|
|
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|
|
| 518 |
| I was like a tom boy too, well, like a real boy I guess. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 519 |
| To succeed in business today takes one word ... beheading. |
|
|
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|
|
| 520 |
| The devil is my husband ... 666 |
|
|
|
|
|
| 521 |
|
| 522 |
|
| 523 |
|
| 524 |
| That Tom Waits makes me moist. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 525 |
|
| 526 |
| Spongebob Squarepants is, like, awesome. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 527 |
|
| 528 |
| Wait, wait! It was a joke! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 529 |
| 645 Server Error: Server in the bathroom. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 530 |
| Cartoon Aerosmith, yeah frickin right... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 531 |
| Discover the movie that critics are calling "...Perverse..." |
|
|
|
|
|
| 532 |
| Where the hell did I leave that Captain Crunch? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 533 |
| Tell me the truth, am I fat? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 534 |
| First to 1000 tacos wins. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 535 |
| Buy my crap at http://www.cafeshops.com/banditocrap ... puh-leeze. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 536 |
| The cars not here? OH CRAP! That kid was locked in the tru -- uh, nevermind. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 537 |
| Ah, let em sell their cigarettes. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 538 |
| Having sex with grandme... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 539 |
|
| 540 |
| My colon feels about a hundred pounds right now. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 541 |
| Are you chargin me with sumpthin copper? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 542 |
|
| 543 |
|
| 544 |
|
| 545 |
| I once knew a man named Yellow... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 546 |
| My ass is FREAKIN ON FIRE! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 547 |
| Living on the internet hurts ... a lot. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 548 |
| You want to get shot or somethin? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 549 |
| How can husbands in the military keep their wives faithful? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 550 |
| Stupid wife and their stupid rules... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 551 |
| Can I just say something? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 552 |
|
| 553 |
| I hate this crap ... HATE IT! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 554 |
| Kiss my stinky Bandito ASS! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 555 |
| Let me just say, you disgust me. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 556 |
| When life gives you lemons, take your pants down immediately. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 557 |
| I went on this cruise, I had lots of sex. My ass is sore though. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 558 |
| Boats always remind me of the time Grandpa took me fishing. I hate that bastard. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 559 |
| My penis is my spirit guide. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 560 |
|
| 561 |
| Krunk Dirshbag, never been a more accurate name. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 562 |
| Discraceful, just discraceful. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 563 |
| 222.1 WANK, Radio Bandito... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 564 |
| Somewhere out there, right now, someone is bleeding. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 565 |
|
| 566 |
| I was promised a cone of silence... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 567 |
|
| 568 |
|
| 569 |
| That King Otho must be stopped ... he had sex with an aborted baby fer crissakes! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 570 |
| My experience tells me that poets are full of crap. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 571 |
| I know Lucy Lui ... by know I mean am currently stalking. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 572 |
|
| 573 |
| Alley McBeal is a plaque on this Earth. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 574 |
|
| 575 |
|
| 576 |
|
| 577 |
| Bandito President in 2021! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 578 |
| Listen, shut the fuck up. I mean it. Yeah you. Um, gotta go (Yipe!) |
|
|
|
|
|
| 579 |
| I was an extra in "Three Amigos", really. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 580 |
|
| 581 |
| That cat has all my pot... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 582 |
|
| 583 |
| Alright, last call guys... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 584 |
|
| 585 |
| Can I have some money for a lap dance? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 586 |
| Do you mind if my best friend joins us? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 587 |
| Try the new BANDITO Ceaser Salad! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 588 |
|
| 589 |
| lets go to the video tape, Hal... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 590 |
| Rock out with your cock out |
|
|
|
|
|
| 591 |
| Cockfaced for life, thats what she said. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 592 |
|
| 593 |
|
| 594 |
| How are there any cities in Japan with all of em giant robots and all... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 595 |
| Direct me to the "American Gladiators" studo. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 596 |
| Strong women scare me, well all women actually... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 597 |
| Yeah, James Bond, yeah... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 598 |
| I got married in Vegas, just about the only place you can marry a pet. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 599 |
|
| 600 |
| Girth, thats where I got it... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 601 |
| The exotic aroma of rubber and fuel... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 602 |
|
| 603 |
| Dear Turbo, I watch the show regularly and what would you say is the hardest event. Signed Bandito |
|
|
|
|
|
| 604 |
| The First Network for Bandito. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 605 |
|
| 606 |
| What is my daugher dooing |
|
|
|
|
|
| 607 |
| What is my daugher dooing |
|
|
|
|
|
| 608 |
| Take that cultured society... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 609 |
| I have a lot of heroin addicted friends, and they all say the same thing ... "You got a dollar?" |
|
|
|
|
|
| 610 |
|
| 611 |
|
| 612 |
| MY CATS POOP A LOT AND IT SMELLS SO BAD. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 613 |
|
| 614 |
|
| 615 |
|
| 616 |
|
| 617 |
| What is this, some kind of intervention thing? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 618 |
| Ah just be an adult about it... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 619 |
| Maybe sensless violence will cure my boredom... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 620 |
| I lift the Giglio, just me... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 621 |
|
| 622 |
|
| 623 |
| Boobies, boobies, I like boobies... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 624 |
| Should I pinch you or bite you or something? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 625 |
| Ah girls with blushing red faces... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 626 |
|
| 627 |
| I love when you speak to me in French Kitty Cat... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 628 |
| This place could use some sprucing up. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 629 |
| I am here to listen to you. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 630 |
|
| 631 |
|
| 632 |
| I have a small problem I have to take care of. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 633 |
|
| 634 |
| Is it a problem or an issue? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 635 |
|
| 636 |
| Those lesbians can have their stinking old bar... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 637 |
| Hello Mr. President? This is Bandito ... No the guy from the webpage ... thats right, with the cat, and the running of the mouth...Hello? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 638 |
|
| 639 |
|
| 640 |
|
| 641 |
|
| 642 |
| Cookies huh? I like the sound of that... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 643 |
|
| 644 |
|
| 645 |
|
| 646 |
| Whydja have ta go Bob Hope ... (Sniff, sniff) |
|
|
|
|
|
| 647 |
| I would also enjoy being surprised by my burial. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 648 |
| The Casa Del Sol street fair was awesome! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 649 |
|
| 650 |
| Kitty, you and me are a rock and roll couple. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 651 |
|
| 652 |
| I came up with three words in a row that start with F |
|
|
|
|
|
| 653 |
| Is Max never coming back to Conan? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 654 |
|
| 655 |
| I gotta get me some of that Queen Latifa |
|
|
|
|
|
| 656 |
|
| 657 |
|
| 658 |
| Whoa, he hit that guy real hard... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 659 |
| The stylish 2002 BANDITO! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 660 |
| Hampsters give me the willies. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 661 |
| I knew there was something funny about the ass... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 662 |
| floppy pod dis sag la fly |
|
|
|
|
|
| 663 |
| Lou Dobbs looks like the Dad from Mary Poppins. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 664 |
| Supercalifrajalisticexpialadocius.... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 665 |
|
| 666 |
| the air is dry and swallowing me |
|
|
|
|
|
| 667 |
|
| 668 |
|
| 669 |
|
| 670 |
| Shout out to Folio Magazine |
|
|
|
|
|
| 671 |
|
| 672 |
|
| 673 |
|
| 674 |
|
| 675 |
|
| 676 |
|
| 677 |
|
| 678 |
|
| 679 |
| i walkied and walked but i never found it |
|
|
|
|
|
| 680 |
|
| 681 |
|
| 682 |
|
| 683 |
| bandido smells like feeto |
|
|
|
|
|
| 684 |
|
| 685 |
| blackout=massconfusion=massdeswtruction |
|
|
|
|
|
| 686 |
|
| 687 |
|
| 688 |
| pizza burgers are too messy |
|
|
|
|
|
| 689 |
|
| 690 |
|
| 691 |
|
| 692 |
|
| 693 |
|
| 694 |
|
| 695 |
|
| 696 |
|
| 697 |
|
| 698 |
|
| 699 |
|
| 700 |
|
| 701 |
|
| 702 |
|
| 703 |
| why do we hurl after gettin so bent that is not necessary |
|
|
|
|
|
| 704 |
| why do we hurl after gettin so bent that is not necessary |
|
|
|
|
|
| 705 |
| LEGALIZE MARIJUANA BEFORE I DIE DAMMIT I WANT TO SMOKE POT IN FRONT OF COPS AND LAUGH |
|
|
|
|
|
| 706 |
| My cat is like my only friend man. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 707 |
|
| 708 |
| Pardon me, but is that a wicker basket? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 709 |
| Holy Shit was Zelda Seasons hard. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 710 |
| I wish the Maker would finish me off... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 711 |
| There is nothing more satisfying than cleaning ones ears... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 712 |
| Can it Be?! A bowl filled with women? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 713 |
| 444 Server Error: Bon6 Hole Pr0duction C#ee%e.#$? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 714 |
|
| 715 |
|
| 716 |
|
| 717 |
|
| 718 |
|
| 719 |
|
| 720 |
|
| 721 |
|
| 722 |
| Shout out to my Peeps at BW (holla back!) |
|
|
|
|
|
| 723 |
|
| 724 |
|
| 725 |
| The Lunatic is on the Grass... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 726 |
|
| 727 |
| Bandito! Now ready to wear. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 728 |
| ITCHY ... TASTY ... ITCHY ... TASTY ... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 729 |
|
| 730 |
| No No Mr. Crabs, just say hello... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 731 |
|
| 732 |
| Can you feel the love tonight? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 733 |
| Are Mets fans meant to suffer? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 734 |
|
| 735 |
| I SAY DRUNK BANDITO WHAT SA YOU |
|
|
|
|
|
| 736 |
| WOULD ME WITH MY PANTS DOWN , YELLING BE TOO SINISTER ? IM SORRY |
|
|
|
|
|
| 737 |
| happy fucking house warming woooooooooo |
|
|
|
|
|
| 738 |
| I MUST SLEEP I SAY ALL IS HAVE A GOOD MORNING |
|
|
|
|
|
| 739 |
|
| 740 |
| Fuckin cops searched Joel cause he was standing next to an empty beer bottle! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 741 |
| Pablo Honey, come to Florida |
|
|
|
|
|
| 742 |
|
| 743 |
| 18 straight weeks of new Aqua Teen Hunger Force? If I only had a TV. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 744 |
| Now is the hour of our discontent... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 745 |
| Where do I find your boss? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 746 |
|
| 747 |
|
| 748 |
|
| 749 |
| Jupiter Jazz part II (joy) |
|
|
|
|
|
| 750 |
| Ah Faye, can this Bandito tame your restless heart? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 751 |
| One - frickin - thousand. Yup. |
|
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|
|
|
| 752 |
|
| 753 |
|
| 754 |
| Why is it not ever night? |
|
|
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|
| 755 |
|
| 756 |
| Dont you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night? HAH! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 757 |
|
| 758 |
| I wish they all could be California girls :( |
|
|
|
|
|
| 759 |
|
| 760 |
|
| 761 |
|
| 762 |
|
| 763 |
|
| 764 |
| Ah Counting Crows, how I miss you... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 765 |
| I once had a reason to live.... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 766 |
| Troubles make a man weary. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 767 |
| Direct me to an honest job... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 768 |
|
| 769 |
| Nice barret. Are you french? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 770 |
|
| 771 |
| Anybody suck any good boobies lately? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 772 |
| A - SS - HO - LE Everybody now... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 773 |
| The internet teaches you many things ... mostly how to manually masterbate most common animals... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 774 |
| This "Server Error" landscape is weird... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 775 |
|
| 776 |
|
| 777 |
| We were right all along -- ALEX WAS GAY! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 778 |
| We fought that bloody war together... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 779 |
| DRUGZ. They make reality go away. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 780 |
|
| 781 |
|
| 782 |
| Wait till they get a load of me... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 783 |
| THINK. Even if it hurts sometimes. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 784 |
| By PR I mean Puerto Rico, ofcourse... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 785 |
|
| 786 |
|
| 787 |
| how many people are there in the world |
|
|
|
|
|
| 788 |
|
| 789 |
|
| 790 |
| "Come Horatio! To the Gool Mines! I hear the Beefalo is skewering the peasant children." |
|
|
|
|
|
| 791 |
|
| 792 |
| Please save the children from Sally. She will eat them. Do you want that on your conscience?? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 793 |
|
| 794 |
| Make friends not amongst the poets. They will sing too much of you. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 795 |
| i once saw a spider-man struffela. i shit you not. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 796 |
|
| 797 |
| A hot laptop on your penis, thats the best... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 798 |
| A hot laptop on your penis, thats the worst... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 799 |
|
| 800 |
|
| 801 |
|
| 802 |
|
| 803 |
|
| 804 |
|
| 805 |
|
| 806 |
| I BROUGHT BAD UR FONDUE SET |
|
|
|
|
|
| 807 |
| A dingledong in the asscheesemo |
|
|
|
|
|
| 808 |
|
| 809 |
|
| 810 |
|
| 811 |
| Long ago, scientists used to roam this very land... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 812 |
|
| 813 |
| That spoon I was eating witgh \ |
|
|
|
|
|
| 814 |
|
| 815 |
| I got milk in my pubes... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 816 |
|
| 817 |
|
| 818 |
|
| 819 |
|
| 820 |
|
| 821 |
| I need to trim my nose hairs |
|
|
|
|
|
| 822 |
| I need to trim my nose hairs |
|
|
|
|
|
| 823 |
| harness love expell peace |
|
|
|
|
|
| 824 |
|
| 825 |
|
| 826 |
| And the award for the best bandito in a musical bandito goes to ... BANDITO! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 827 |
| I lost my clitoris somewhere |
|
|
|
|
|
| 828 |
|
| 829 |
|
| 830 |
|
| 831 |
| Life is a no-win hostage situation. No one gets out alive. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 832 |
| Life is a no-win hostage situation. No one gets out alive. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 833 |
| Shit PIss & Corruption. Ahh Capitalism. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 834 |
| Shit PIss & Corruption. Ahh Capitalism. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 835 |
|
| 836 |
|
| 837 |
| Gol-dang Buffalo Poets always get kinda crazy... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 838 |
| el chuppicabra es taco salud |
|
|
|
|
|
| 839 |
|
| 840 |
|
| 841 |
|
| 842 |
| Why is there Christian Rock???? WHY LORD WHY??? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 843 |
|
| 844 |
| Its pronounced BAN-DEET-TO dickhead!!! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 845 |
| I like to watch the cat lick his balls. I tried licking my balls once, but it hurt my back. So I just watch the cat. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 846 |
| If only God would strike me down. Why do you punish me with existence Lord? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 847 |
| Only pussies drive Bowties. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 848 |
| Due to the skyrocketing popularity of STarbucks, Juan Valdez was forced out of the coffee industry, and has since found his calling in the California Border Patrol. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 849 |
| Please Lord, just one lightning bolt out of a clear blue sky. Is that too much to ask? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 850 |
| All of the information it takes to make me can be inscribed on a 2d globe around me -OK |
|
|
|
|
|
| 851 |
|
| 852 |
|
| 853 |
|
| 854 |
|
| 855 |
| Internet mice are scary fuckers... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 856 |
| 565 Server Error: Server a lame-ass lame-o with lame teeth and a lame face and is just damn lame. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 857 |
|
| 858 |
| John Stamos should be shot. 10 10 987 my ass! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 859 |
| Steve sucks! Yes Steve, this means U |
|
|
|
|
|
| 860 |
| I like Manhattan Special. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 861 |
| My Pappy used to pistol whip me... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 862 |
| One more move and yer DED! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 863 |
| Fuckin Matt leaves me this dog... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 864 |
| All I wanted is to be an artist and live in Florence... sob... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 865 |
|
| 866 |
| Act now, supplies are limited! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 867 |
|
| 868 |
|
| 869 |
| All the old chicken you can muster... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 870 |
| you look fat in those pants |
|
|
|
|
|
| 871 |
| this cat is pissing me off |
|
|
|
|
|
| 872 |
|
| 873 |
|
| 874 |
|
| 875 |
|
| 876 |
|
| 877 |
| The cows are not what they seem. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 878 |
| Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 879 |
| Daddy drinks because you cry. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 880 |
|
| 881 |
| Senility is not a disease; it is a blessing. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 882 |
| Sweet dreams are made of ME, bay-bee! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 883 |
| Warning: Consumption of alcohol might make objects appear better looking then they are. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 884 |
| Quoth the raven, "Eat my shorts". |
|
|
|
|
|
| 885 |
|
| 886 |
| Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, good bye. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 887 |
| I am the very model of a modern major general! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 888 |
| Would you like to swing from my groin? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 889 |
| Quick, someone get me a mocca latte and a self help book. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 890 |
| Some people are just walking posterchildren for 76th trimester abortions. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 891 |
| God, am I ever going to get to put these guns down? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 892 |
|
| 893 |
| A woman is not property, and anyon who thinks otherwise are living in a dreamworld. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 894 |
| When the fox gnaws -- smile! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 895 |
| Money is a powerful aphrodisiac. But flowers work almost as well. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 896 |
| Money is the sincerest of all flattery. Women love to be flattered. So do men. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 897 |
| Everybody lies about sex. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 898 |
| Do not handicap your children by making their lives easy |
|
|
|
|
|
| 899 |
| To stay young requires unceasing cultivation of the ability to unlearn old falsehoods. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 900 |
| Always store beer in a dark place. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 901 |
| meow, said the cat. meow. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 902 |
| Get a shot off fast. This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 903 |
| A brute kills for pleasure. A fool kills from hate. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 904 |
| Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 905 |
| An elephant: A mouse built to government specifications. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 906 |
| I knew a girl named Isabele once...Heh heh, she really blew me away, heh, ...if you know what I mean..............................................................................................................................................that means sh |
|
|
|
|
|
| 907 |
|
| 908 |
|
| 909 |
| who is roger and why is he God :P |
|
|
|
|
|
| 910 |
| Hey, I love throwing up... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 911 |
| Do you wanna go throw up? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 912 |
| If Roger is God, God is getting fat... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 913 |
| You are the Spalding Grey of crap. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 914 |
|
| 915 |
| My duty is to get you to the space station, and I intend to have a whole cat when I get there! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 916 |
| Koala, rainbow, crap, ... he he ... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 917 |
| Northern Lights, Hells Yeah! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 918 |
|
| 919 |
|
| 920 |
| Bandito and kitty in constant peril... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 921 |
| If sex were easier to come by, this country would be a lot less violent. Its true. Look at Morocco. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 922 |
|
| 923 |
|
| 924 |
|
| 925 |
|
| 926 |
|
| 927 |
|
| 928 |
| Gol dang lieing bartender... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 929 |
| That two-bit bartender promised me booze and women, and all he delivered was man love... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 930 |
| Ah, that Ellen Degeneres is bewitching. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 931 |
| Hmmm, a cold front moving in on the Bandito plains |
|
|
|
|
|
| 932 |
| Bark bark, howl, wimper, wimper, BARK! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 933 |
| Dont be eating those ass worms! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 934 |
| I keeeeeel you |
| http://www.superbad.com |
|
|
|
|
| 935 |
| Errie, isn't it... |
| http://www.rogerkenny.com/bandito/band.php?pick=935 |
|
|
|
|
| 936 |
| I'll tell you what time it is... |
| http://dev.mysql.com/doc/mysql/en/timestamp-4-1.html |
|
|
|
|
| 937 |
|
| 938 |
| Try again dorko. |
| http://www.milk.com |
|
|
|
|
| 939 |
| here we go (crossing fingers) |
| http://www.crossingfingers.org |
|
|
|
|
| 940 |
| MOOSE! |
| http://www.buffaloreadings.com |
|
|
|
|
| 941 |
| Do my balls look healty to you? |
| http://images.google.com/images?q=betty+white |
|
|
|
|
| 942 |
| What do I look like, I give a damn or something, jeeeze... |
| http://www.fart.org/ |
|
|
|
|
| 943 |
|
| 944 |
|
| 945 |
| Buffalo! |
| http://www.buffaloreadings.com |
|
|
|
|
| 946 |
| Bring me the said girl scout cookies!, or maybe just the girl scouts. |
| http://cnet.search.com/search?chkpt=astg.cnet.fd.search.cnet&q=porn&tag=srch |
|
|
|
|
| 947 |
| C'mon kitty, we'll start our own club, with dancing girls, and no drink minimum. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 948 |
| Maybe so, Senator Fun Dip, but I still have the guns. |
| http://www.supercoolstuff.com/items/candy/cn011.htm |
|
|
|
|
| 949 |
| Oh, so just because I'm a Bandito, you think I'm Mexican, ... I am but that's not the point. |
| http://karlton.hamilton.com/scrapbook/gifs/bandito.jpeg |
|
|
|
|
| 950 |
| Listen...... Oh it's just my shoe alarm. Nevermind. |
| http://www.moviemarket.co.uk/Agent_86_Maxwell_Smart_C300014/ |
|
|
|
|
| 951 |
| Hanging out on webservers all day ain't easy. Well yes it really is. HA. |
| http://www.cobraelectronics.com/ |
|
|
|
|
| 952 |
| 6:am, time to not sleep |
| http://www.tempurpedic.com/tempurcmsvb/ |
|
|
|
|
| 953 |
| Vodka is all I wake up for anymore. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 954 |
| Whiskey is great in the mroning! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 955 |
|
| 956 |
|
| 957 |
|
| 958 |
| Ain't no heaven, Ain't no hell, where I'm goin' can't nobody tell |
|
|
|
|
|
| 959 |
| Take my 32-20 cut her half in two |
|
|
|
|
|
| 960 |
|
| 961 |
| UhP! Spring's a-comin' best to get naked now |
|
|
|
|
|
| 962 |
|
| 963 |
| you're so annoying/dork dork dork dork dork dork dork/stay out of my room |
|
|
|
|
|
| 964 |
| I can see clearly now the rain is gone! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 965 |
| Never get involved with anyone in the Albanian mafia. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 966 |
| I ate wildebeest meat once. |
| It was pretty good. |
|
|
|
|
| 967 |
| THIS IS BLACK TERRITORY. GET OUT. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 968 |
| Ah, nothing like hot chicken parm on a cold day. |
| http://www.eeecooks.com/recipes/2003/05/04/chicken.html |
|
|
|
|
| 969 |
| i dont understand this.. |
| no really i don't. |
|
|
|
|
| 970 |
| Absinthe? |
| http://www.strindbergandhelium.com/ |
|
|
|
|
| 971 |
| Yup, just walkin this-uh way |
| http://www.sock.com/ |
|
|
|
|
| 972 |
| I'm running away from that Strongbad guy |
| http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html |
|
|
|
|
| 973 |
|
| 974 |
|
| 975 |
|
| 976 |
|
| 977 |
|
| 978 |
|
| 979 |
| The flask is under my hat. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 980 |
| baweepgrannaweepninnibahm |
|
|
|
|
|
| 981 |
| King Ashurbanipal |
| http://www.ninjatune.net/home/ |
|
|
|
|
| 982 |
| I will not rhyme on tracks... |
|
|
|
|
|
| 983 |
| S'mo fo butter layin' to the bone. Jackin' me up. Tightly. |
| http://rob.kogan.com/humor/airplane.htm |
|
|
|
|
| 984 |
| Cutty say he cant hang. |
| http://rob.kogan.com/humor/airplane.htm |
|
|
|
|
| 985 |
| Oh Sewardess, I speak jive. |
| http://rob.kogan.com/humor/airplane.htm |
|
|
|
|
| 986 |
| Jus' hang loose blooood. She goonna catch up on the` rebound a de medcide. |
| http://rob.kogan.com/humor/airplane.htm |
|
|
|
|
| 987 |
| poke 53280, 0 |
| http://www.students.uni-mainz.de/bauec002/FRMain.html |
|
|
|
|
| 988 |
| poke 53281, 0 |
| http://www.students.uni-mainz.de/bauec002/FRMain.html |
|
|
|
|
| 989 |
| Ah yes, Commodore 64 |
| http://www.students.uni-mainz.de/bauec002/FRMain.html |
|
|
|
|
| 990 |
|
| 991 |
|
| 992 |
| Chunk 666! |
| http://www.dclxvi.org/chunk/what/index.html |
|
|
|
|
| 993 |
| you're supposed to protect your face...not your weiner!! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 994 |
|
| 995 |
| God Damned Crack Hos' always beein like, 'Dont worry baby, youre good, youre so good...' |
|
|
|
|
|
| 996 |
|
| 997 |
| BANDITO Gets the honeys G... (sob) |
|
|
|
|
|
| 998 |
| Did you just see that? Aliens. |
| http://science.howstuffworks.com/alien-physiology.htm |
|
|
|
|
| 999 |
| Do I have a number on my neck? |
| http://www.revisionsoftware.com/999/ |
|
|
|
|
| 1000 |
| Bill, bill, bill, voter registration blah-blah-BUTTERFLY! |
| http://www.gagworks.com/browseproducts/BUTTERFLY-FUN-MONEY.HTML |
|
|
|
|
| 1001 |
| I gots one of them oPods, you know, an Optumis Prime Oldschool Doll, yeah. |
| http://search.ebay.com/transformers_W0QQfsopZ1QQfromZR3QQsacatZ246 |
|
|
|
|
| 1002 |
| A thousand troubles- HOT DAMN! |
|
|
|
|
|
| 1003 |
|
| 1004 |
| Margret, why you no like? |
|
|
|
|
|
| 1005 |
| Here's a tip, hit anyting with an ice cube on a cold day, and it will crack into a million pieces. For real. |
|
|
|
|
|
| 1006 |
| Bandito's Home Tip #71: Burnt Sienna is a paint. |
|
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| 1007 |
| Bandito Home Tip #75: Rancid Breakfast Sausage CAN be used as insulation. |
| http://www.acidlogic.com/meatstink.htm |
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| 1008 |
| Fricken babies... |
| http://www.cobbs.ca/bbs/archive/index.php/t-520.html |
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| 1009 |
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| 1010 |
| Bandito Home Tip #151: Hampsters can be trained to act like towels. |
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| 1011 |
| Mike Da Saint gave me is poncho |
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| 1012 |
| That's fucked up about Dimebag |
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| 1013 |
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| 1014 |
| I am bandito, hear me roar |
| http://charlesfransis.deviantart.com |
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| 1015 |
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| 1016 |
| This starbucks coffee tastes like dirt mixed with cat urine...HEY?! |
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| 1017 |
| Me and Ray Charles put out a record right before he died called 'Move Over Fattie'. Did you buy it? |
| http://www.amazon.com |
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| 1018 |
| That damn Fleece |
| http://www.livejournal.com/users/rideronthestorm/ |
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| 1019 |
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| 1020 |
| Brian wrote a song about me |
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| 1021 |
| Bastard King Otho |
| http://www.livejournal.com/users/kingotho/ |
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| 1022 |
| Go ahead. Eat that hair. It's good for you. Vitamins or sumptin. ... EAT IT. |
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| 1023 |
| Do you believe in angels? |
| http://images.google.com/images?q=vanessa+angel |
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| 1024 |
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| 1025 |
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| 1026 |
| Groucho Marx is stronger then ever and he's not going to take anymore of your shit this time around |
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| 1027 |
| Whatever you've just thought of, the answer is "yes"; but whatever you've just looked at, the answer is "no" |
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| 1028 |
| NO PARKING ANYTIME |
| http://www.thescatter.com/images/uploads/pimp.jpg |
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| 1029 |
| THIS bar sucks |
| http://www.rogerkenny.com/bandito/band.php?back=saloon |
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| 1030 |
| Bush won?!? Didn't see that comin... |
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| 1031 |
| So long Gonzo Bastard. Solong Hunter, So long Duke. |
| http://www.gonzo.org/ |
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| 1032 |
| 'When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.' -Hunter S. Thompson |
| http://www.gonzo.org/ |
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| 1033 |
| I was made with the same technology used to make 'The Incredibles' known in the industry as Bologna Processing. |
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| 1034 |
| Take that last shred of sanity |
| http://www.butcher-packer.com/pg_sausage_kits_trail.htm |
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| 1035 |
| You wouldnt expect it, but my ass is a hi-speed cd burner. Flaming wire, I think they said... |
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| 1036 |
| fried chicken will take over the world |
| www.kfc.com |
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| 1037 |
| juggalos will rule all!!!! |
| http://www.insaneclownposse.com |
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| 1038 |
| radioactive taco people dance 2 richie valens records when in heat. while wearing rain ponchos and smacking bald cats with paddles |
| http://www.aspca.org/site/PageServer |
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| 1039 |
| My G4 is acting up. i.e. bitch slapping me while I sleep, then acting like nothing's wrong. |
| http://www.apple.com |
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| 1040 |
| Nobody moove, I lost a contact |
| http://www.apple.com |
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| 1041 |
| Can you SMELL what the Rock is cookin? |
| http://www.faceparty.com/brandnewtbs |
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| 1042 |
| Street crime is inversely related to free internet porn. |
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| 1043 |
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| 1044 |
| I swear, if you could only see my dick, just one peek... |
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| 1045 |
| The williamsburg bridge is held up in some places by newspaper. |
| http://memory.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/r?ammem/papr:@field(NUMBER+@band(lcmp002+m2b06704)) |
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| 1046 |
| Thomas Edison stood where I smoked up |
| http://memory.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/D?papr:1:./temp/~ammem_N0Jf:: |
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| 1047 |
| There is no Bandito, only Zool |
| http://forums.ghostbusters.net/ |
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| 1048 |
| What if, like, this were all only a webpage... |
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| 1049 |
| If there are no 'o's in your trouble, you won't be in the saloon ... kindof. |
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| 1050 |
| Bandito can change at any moment |
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| 1051 |
| Server Error 271: Please firmly grab server's love handle. |
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| 1052 |
| Dan Rather can bite me, unless he wants to inerview me, then I'll bite him. |
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| 1053 |
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| 1054 |
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| 1055 |
| pimples eat glass |
| accidents regurgitate luck |
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| 1056 |
| yellow oh yellow why are you blue |
| the sun decides |
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| 1057 |
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| 1058 |
| How do you give things voices/ |
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| 1059 |
| Pook has a gigantico molto grande weiner!!! |
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| 1060 |
| My boobies are molto grande gigantico! |
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| 1061 |
| Soties pee pee leaks from my ears!!! |
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| 1062 |
| I'm a rappin baby kitty kat! |
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| 1063 |
| How many kitty kat's do you know?? I know 2! |
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| 1064 |
| When your pee pee smells spray it w/ perfumes! |
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| 1065 |
| When your pee pee smells febreeze the mofo!! |
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| 1066 |
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| 1067 |
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| 1068 |
| I only wear Chanel No. 5 |
| http://www.chanel.com/ |
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| 1069 |
| Oooo, those naked girls are touching. Oooo and they're related. |
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| 1070 |
| I prefer Armani panchos to Versace |
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| 1071 |
| I used to be belimic, now I'm anorexic. |
| http://www.4woman.gov/faq/easyread/anorexia-etr.htm |
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| 1072 |
| Take the intense 3 week Bandito Strip tease Training Course. |
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| 1073 |
| Thank you Superman! (Thanks Superman) |
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| 1074 |
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| 1075 |
| My human baby says 'Meow' |
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| 1076 |
| I'm on the Bandito Diet. I cut out all my rattlesnake intake. |
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| 1077 |
| I want to be your home page. |
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| 1078 |
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| 1079 |
| Damn look at those titties |
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| 1080 |
| Bandito cannot be held responsible for his actions. |
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| 1081 |
| Damn we fucked that up bad... |
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| 1082 |
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| 1083 |
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| 1084 |
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| 1085 |
| I used to read MAD magazine all the fricken time. |
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| 1086 |
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| 1087 |
| Is this page getting weirder or what? |
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| 1088 |
| That cat just moved, I swear |
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| 1089 |
| This is who I am, who I WANT to be... |
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| 1090 |
| This way to Sim City |
| http://simcity.ea.com/ |
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| 1091 |
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| 1092 |
| DAVE CHAPELLE! |
| http://www.comedycentral.com/tv_shows/chappellesshow/ |
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| 1093 |
| In 1954 I washed up onto the shores of St. Louis. |
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| 1094 |
| if you add '?pick=trouble #' to see that specific trouble. |
| http://www.rogerkenny.com/bandito/band.php?pick=1094 |
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| 1095 |
| if you add '?back=[spring|winter|desert|error|saloon]' to see that background |
| http://www.rogerkenny.com/bandito/band.php?back=error |
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| 1096 |
| Did you know that Kennedy and Lincoln both had a secretary named Bandito? |
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| 1097 |
| 'Bandito did it' -John Wilkes Booth 1865 |
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| 1098 |
| Can you believe they gave ME a webpage. |
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| 1099 |
| Soldiers dragged Booth from the blazing barn. |
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| 1100 |
| The guy who killed John Wilkes Booth had castrated himself for once seeking out prostitues. (History Channel) |
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| 1101 |
| Molotov took his pants off at Buffalo Readings! |
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| 1102 |
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| 1103 |
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| 1104 |
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| 1105 |
| Bandito is dooing the South a favor. |
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| 1106 |
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| 1107 |
| Server Error 1107: DONT PUT THAT THING ON MEEEeeee....... |
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| 1108 |
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| 1109 |
| Me and Fredric Douglas was pals you see. Took me to this chitlin place, Mmmmm, hmmmm! |
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| 1110 |
| Let my people go. Just the banditos. |
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| 1111 |
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| 1112 |
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| 1113 |
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| 1114 |
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| 1115 |
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| 1116 |
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| 1117 |
| I'm playing with my snake. |
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| 1118 |
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| 1119 |
| Oooo, is that a tempurpedic matres? Ha ha ,ha ha. kill me. |
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| 1120 |
| The future is only chopped up bits of the present |
| http://www.lucaspickford.com/burr.htm |
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| 1121 |
| i don't think she loves me. |
| paranoia |
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| 1122 |
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| 1123 |
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| 1124 |
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| 1125 |
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| 1126 |
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| 1127 |
| Whoa, the moon looks really big when you're on it. |
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| 1128 |
| I'm part of a mining mission to this here moon. |
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| 1129 |
| What the hell am I doing on the fricken moon. |
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| 1130 |
| There's no bar on this here moon. Maybe they meant some other Sea of Tranquillity |
| http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/photo_gallery/photogallery-moon.html |
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| 1131 |
| Here we come, walking down the moon... |
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| 1132 |
| Are the stars out tonight? |
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| 1133 |
| Was that an alien. Or was it me... |
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| 1134 |
| The image of the hollywood Bandito is changing |
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| 1135 |
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| 1136 |
| Bandito Goes to Hollywood |
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| 1137 |
| Bandito is the Ultimate Bad boy... |
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| 1138 |
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| 1139 |
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| 1140 |
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| 1141 |
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| 1142 |
| Moon, moon, moon, nothing but moon |
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| 1143 |
| We've been wandering around this barren moonscape for hours, and still no sign of your frisbee. Can we go home now? |
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| 1144 |
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| 1145 |
| Bandito is the first wonder of the 21st Century |
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| 1146 |
| The moon looked better on the brochure |
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| 1147 |
| Don't you love me anymore? |
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| 1148 |
| Richard Cardiello District Superintendant |
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| 1149 |
| Hello Supernintendo Chalmers |
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| 1150 |
| When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie |
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| 1151 |
| We got a great healthcare plan here on the moon |
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| 1152 |
| Wait a minute, there's no basement to the moon. Damn gake fortune tellers. |
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| 1153 |
| You got that right buddy. |
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| 1154 |
<